7 Reasons to Date a Republican

They say to "love your enemies." But I say, make love to them.


I was recently talking to one of my friends in San Francisco about why now days it seems that Republicans and Democrats can't even sit in the same room with one another without having a moral breakdown.

Everybody is so upset at Congress for being ultra-partisan and refusing to work together. True, Congress is trippin. But so are we. I would argue that Congress is a microcosm of America. If you are liberal (like myself and most of my friends), you probably haven't sat down with a Republican recently and really got to the root of why they beleive in certain things. We generally shout, "That's racist!" and run away, presumably to lock ourselves in our rooms to throw darts at posters of Dick Cheney.

Conversely, if you are Republican, when is the last time you sat down with a liberal and asked them why they beleive what they do?

Which goes back to my original point: Date a Republican. Folks, I'm only 20% kidding and 80% serious about this. Keep readin'.

Here are 7 reasons why you should date a Republican:

1. You're guaranteed to have more interesting conversations

You probably spend all your time dating like-minded people, and pretending to be interested in their stupid boring stories. Imagine if you got to know someone with a drastically different background than yours.You could spend hours in deep, interesting conversation, learning about someone's life experiences from a completely new perspective.

TIP: Make yourself vulnerable. Listen to their stories without interrupting, without arguing, even if the comments slightly offend you. Then tell your story to them. Then make out, because you are dating.

2. Your network grows

It tends to be true that liberals know liberals, who know other liberals, whose cats are also liberal. How exciting.How many times have you been in a group where all you do is agree with each other the entire night.

"I believe in [insert hippie cause]!"
"Me too!"
"Yea me too."
"What did you say I didn't hear? But I probably agree too!"


We all agree


Okay, It's cool to agree with each other, but agreeing doesn't challenge anyone. If you really want to convince people about your cause, then you're going to have to talk to people who don't believe in it. Knowing people in different parties means you meet a whole new circle of people. New friends, new families, new job opportunities. Oh, what's that you say? You don't want to meet those people? Your just like Congress.

3. You get better at arguing (a.k.a. articulating your opinion)
Perhaps the most important thing you will get from dating a Republican is that you have a rare chance to find out why they believe what they do. The whole point of this union is not to convince anyone how right you are. It's to try to authentically understand how people have come to the conclusions that they have. Understanding where people are coming from makes it incredibly easier for you to appeal to other Republicans. You will be able to cite facts and stories that will help them see your point of view.

So maybe you two (or three if you're kinky) won't agree on everything, but you can still love each other and potentially raise the next generation of politicians who actually tolerate different viewpoints without hating people.

4. Your mind expands, and you will find out new things about yourself

Dating a Republican may mean that you find that you're not as liberal as you thought you were. Back when he was an environmentalist, one thing that Hippie Greg did not realize was how nuts some environmentalists can be. I learned that it is often the case that some "enviros" (do I sound like a conservative now?) care more about the trees and deer(s) than they do humans.

Some would rather shut down factories and businesses even if it means the loss of thousands of decent-paying jobs for poor communities of color. Meanwhile they go back to their secure jobs and their houses by the ocean. These are the types of things I learned from hanging out with moderate Democrats--not even Republicans!

5. Republicans are sexy

I've never seen one in real life but I hear stories.

Mia Love, Republican Congresswoman

I heard he's Republican Ladies

For your more Traditional Republican Taste

                                                               

6. You'll realize that Republicans are human

Republicans are living, breathing creatures like you and me. While you may disagree with some of their views, do not avoid them. I think that conservatives and progressives have much to learn from each other. Hopefully they will see that you are human too. It sounds obvious, but I think that this is what the good ol' USA needs. What better way to understand someone than to have a relationship with them. And when in doubt...

7. You can always break up

Remember, if it's not working our with your Republican mate, you can always cut 'em off like George Bush cut taxes for the rich.

Conclusion

All this dating stuff is easier said than done, I know. But someone's gotta do it. I challenge you to date a Republican. If that sounds scary, start by just talking to one. 

Meanwhile I'll be standing outside of Mia Love's office so I can get an internship. And a date.


Would you date a Republican? Let me know in the comments below.